I'm an Indian Gujarati content creator who got married in a mixed-culture wedding in Ontario in August 2021.
My husband is Tamil Sri Lankan, so we had a bit of a mixed-culture wedding with some Gujarati traditions and Tamil Sri Lankan traditions.
In South Asian culture, there's a lot of emphasis on the wedding being the most important moment in your life. But from the beginning, I felt that while it was important, it wasn't going to be the most important thing in my life. I wanted to celebrate our love, more than anything.
In Sri Lankan culture, they wear a sari throughout the ceremony. But I also wanted to wear a lehenga because that's part of Indian wedding culture.
We ended up having a nice compromise of me entering in a lehenga, and when I did an outfit change that's part of Sri Lankan tradition, I changed into a Tamil silk sari.
I knew what my non-negotiables were, like having good food, wearing both a lehenga and a sari, and having our outfits flow with the decor. Other than that, I found that if you have too many non-negotiables, things can add up pretty quickly.
In Sri Lankan culture, they wear a sari throughout the ceremony. But I also wanted to wear a lehenga because that's part of Indian wedding culture.
We ended up having a nice compromise of me entering in a lehenga, and when I did an outfit change that's part of Sri Lankan tradition, I changed into a Tamil silk sari.
Our wedding came out to be $28,000 in total, which was just under our budget of $30,000.
Our wedding was originally supposed to be in April 2020, but we rescheduled it to the year after because of the pandemic. We were able to save more than $60,000 by downsizing our wedding.
The good thing about Indian weddings is that you make back a good chunk of the money through gifts, because we traditionally receive cash gifts instead of items on a registry.
We also had to cut our guest list from more than 500 people to just 175 guests, which I'm secretly grateful for.
Because of Covid, we had that restriction. But it was mainly our parents that wanted the 500 to 600 guest count. If it were up to us, we would've just had 175 of our closest friends and family, which is how it worked out.
We also saved costs by using what we already had. For example, instead of buying new designer shoes that could cost $500 or more, I wore a pair of sandals I already had. No one saw my feet anyway.
With an Indian wedding, you're not going to see the bride's shoes. When you go on the mandap, which is the wedding stage, you take off your shoes anyway.
I did my own makeup, which can be super expensive especially within the Indian wedding industry, which could cost around $500 to 600 for one day.
I know not everyone can do their own makeup, but this is what I mean by using your own resources. For instance, some other people might be good at DIY and can make their own centerpieces.
We used fake florals for all the wedding decor. They were silk flowers so didn't look super fake, but were a fraction of the cost of real flowers.
A wedding should be about the union between two people rather than a focus on having a grand wedding. I have seen lots of people go into debt to have these grand Indian weddings, and, personally, I don't think it's worth it.
Put yourself first. Put your financial situation first so that you can set yourself up for a better future and step into marriage with the right foot.
For transportation, my sister drove me to the wedding hall in her Subaru, which saved us around $400. No one really saw me come into the wedding, though we did drive off in a nice car afterwards.
A wedding should be about the union between two people rather than a focus on having a grand wedding. I have seen lots of people go into debt to have these grand Indian weddings, and, personally, I don't think it's worth it.
Put yourself first. Put your financial situation first so that you can set yourself up for a better future and step into marriage with the right foot.
We also made some swaps, like a photo backdrop instead of a photo booth, exchanging sentimental gifts over expensive ones, and picking a less pricey photographer for our pre-wedding events.
Normally, you see the bride and groom exchange an expensive gift with a card before the wedding, like an expensive purse or gaming system. Instead of doing that, we decide to make each other memory boxes and write each other a love letter. It definitely saved us money and felt so much more meaningful.
I went with a different photographer than I did for my actual wedding event. I also saved some costs by emphasizing photo over video, because photos are something I think I'm going to use all the time versus video, which maybe you'll watch just once or twice.
I find that in our culture, especially in South Asian culture in North America, weddings can almost become a competition. I just want people to get out of that mindset, and remember to put yourself first.
A wedding should be about the union between two people rather than a focus on having a grand wedding. I have seen lots of people go into debt to have these grand Indian weddings, and, personally, I don't think it's worth it.
Put yourself first. Put your financial situation first so that you can set yourself up for a better future and step into marriage with the right foot.
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